Kid: “I have indigestion from lunch.”
Me: “I’m sorry to hear that. I have indigestion from life.”
Kid: “You do?”
Me: “Yes. It’s called Life Indigestion, and it happens when you’ve had too many life events too quickly.”
Kid: “Ooooh yeah. My dad gets that.”
Me: “Oh does he? And what does he do for it? Because the only thing I’ve found that helps is putting my head in my hands.”
Kid: “Yeah he does that, too. Then he tells my mom (throwing hands in the air, imitating dad) ‘Debra, for god’s sake, get off my back!'”

Cool. I’ll try that.