December 27, 2013

As I’m leaving for my morning run, the (new) neighbor’s dog races over and jumps on me…
Neighbor: “I’m so sorry! He does this to your husband every morning!”
Me: “Oh my god. No. No. That’s my dad. Not my husband. Oh god. NO.”
Neighbor: “Oh. Oh god. Sorry. It’s always from a distance…”
Me: (horrified stare)
Neighbor: “He seems like a very nice man.”
Me: “Please stop saying things.”