9– The number of days it took my co teacher and I to figure out who the random hot dad was who showed up to curriculum night. 
Investigation strategies included: 

• checking each child’s photo decor on their writer’s notebooks
• staring down every mom at dismissal and deducing if she was hot enough to land hot dad 
• causally saying to every child during pack-up, “So…tell me more about your dad,” then ignoring everything the kid said that had nothing to do with physical appearance
• Consulting last year’s teachers 

Finally we solved the mystery. 

And that, kids, is how you do research.