I would like to thank our super tan and relaxed-looking principal for reminding us at our after-school staff meeting today that “if you have the means, you should all REALLY take winter vacations as an opportunity to go somewhere warm and remote, like I just did.”

Yeah, we don’t.

We don’t have the means.

We’re teachers.

Now can we go write the report cards that you just informed us are due tomorrow?

Great.

Thanks.