Dear All Men Everywhere,

It is really REALLY super creepy when the main profile photo on your dating app is a picture of yourself as a young boy. Do you think we like this? I’m so confused. This is the only photo we see in that first instant when we decide if we’re swiping right or left– are you TRYING to attract a woman who looks at a picture of a 5 year old boy and says “Ooooh, tell me MORE!”?

If that IS who you’re looking for, maybe try looking somewhere else.

Like jail.

That’s where pedophiles are. In jail.

Now stop being a creepster. The world has enough problems.

Emily