Eric: “You look really uncomfortable. Is there anything I can do?”

Me: “Get her out of me !!!”

Eric: “Well, I don’t think I can do that.”

Me: “BUT YOU’RE THE ONE WHO PUT HER IN THERE!!”

Eric: “You MADE me! I just wanted a corgi! But you were like ‘No, dogs in the city are too expensive and too much work so LET’S HAVE A KID!'”