My endocrinologist means well but is the oldest person on the planet, with the oldest views in the universe.
Endocrinologist: “Remind me– this is your first baby, correct?”
Endocrinologist: “Wonderful. And how many do you want to have?”
Me: “At least 2. But maybe more, who knows.”
Endocrinologist: “Well, if you want more than that, remember you are 36.”
Me: “I AM?! Well that is brand new information!”
Endocrinologist: “Yes and the clock is ticking. My wife and I had 4, but we started in our mid-twenties.”
Me: “Ok, well. My mom had 4 and started in her mid-30s, so….
Endocrinologist: “REALLY? And how old was she when she had the youngest?”
Me: “Almost 41, I believe?”
Endocrinologist: “And everything is ok with him?”
Me: “EXCUSE ME?! That is extremely offensive.”
Endocrinologist: “I apologize…”
Me: “I will have you know that Zack is the LEAST of our family’s problems.”