Less than two weeks ago, I received the following text from Zack:

So, being the good, caring sister that I am, I gave the appropriate dramatic, concerned response.

We then proceeded to have an in depth, highly detailed and descriptive discussion of his symptoms. Niagra Falls was used as a metaphor to describe the intensity. And, again, like a good, caring sister, I listened and offered sympathy.
Flash forward 13 days, he sent me this video of his dinner tonight:
No. I’m out.
