At Duane Reade…
Cashier: “Ma’am would you like to hear about our back-to-school vaccination program?”
Me: “I am so so so happy to report that NO– NO I DO NOT NEED TO HEAR ANYTHING RELATED TO BACK-TO-SCHOOL ANYMORE!!!!”
Then he declined my high five.
One of our school mottos is “Be yourself– everyone else is already taken.”
So on the first day with the kids tomorrow, my also jewish, white, 30-something co-teacher and I are going to wear matching dresses, necklaces, and hairstyles.
Because leading by example is overrated and hard.
But wearing matching outfits is adorable and fun!
“This teaching thing is easier than I remember!” I thought to myself just now as I left my first day back at work.
Then I remembered the kids weren’t there today.
Tomorrow might be harder.
Eric thought he’d challenge me to a “Who is going to have a more stressful day at work tomorrow” contest, the night before school starts.
Me: “I’m sorry, but you could work triple the hours I work and my day tomorrow would still be infinitely more stressful than yours.”
Eric: “I have to hit my target for the quarter or I get fired!”
Me: “I have to not hit a kid all year or I get fired!”
“Stop agonizing, you still have ONE FULL WEEK of vacation left!”, I said to myself this morning after a night full of back-to-school dreams. And I felt much better.
Then someone who is not a teacher said the same exact thing to me.
So I punched him in the fucking face.
Don’t tell me how to feel, asshole.