That moment when your assistant principal bids on your teacher lunch date at the school auction.
Because no one else did.
And he feels bad for you.
To be fair, no parents from our class attended the auction.**
**Because they don’t care.***
***So I guess any way you slice it, it’s insulting.
What’s that? How was auction, you ask? I don’t know, I didn’t go.
Oh.
The PTA put together a book of prizes for our school’s upcoming auction fundraiser. The teachers all offered various “teacher play dates” as items up for bid. The book shows each teacher’s play date description, with either a photo of that teacher, or a cute little graphic. For example:
Or
Here’s ours:
Yeah. That about sums it up.
Discussing the teaching artist coming to our classroom today, whom we met a few months ago.
Me: “I don’t even remember what he looks like– do you?”
Coteacher: “Yes. Brooklyn.”
He has a beard.
As part of our poetry writing unit, we introduced the kids to limerick poems.
Kid: “I’m not sure I like limerick poems as much as I like other kinds of poetry.”
Me: “Ok, well I like your honesty. And I’m actually impressed that you have such a strong literary opinion.”
Kid: “Yeah, I mean limerick poems are fun to write, I guess, but I really prefer to have more of a challenge.”
Ok, nope. Now you’re annoying.
Coteacher (to kids): “You should all tell your parents to bid on the teacher playdate prize at the auction fundraiser, because if you win, Miss Emily and I will take you out for pizza!”
Kid (dead serious): “I think Vietnamese food would be a better choice. For the more sophisticated palates.”
Yes, kid. If you’re going to wear a vintage Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle shirt to school then I am going to turn to you every few minutes and sing “heroes in a half shell– turtle power!”
I don’t know why you look so surprised.
(Part of the Ebola Mom series)
Oh. Ok.
That awkward moment when you have to use the phrase “private area” with 4th grade boys as you lecture them for punching each other in the penis.
So I added a bird to my usual bird’s nest.
#thingsidoatwork #mastersdegree
Me: “Hey kiddo! Excited to see me?!”
Kid (shrugging shoulders): “I’m not sure.”
Ok then try lying. Jerk.
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