I had that recurring nightmare last night where I’m in college and I have all these exams coming up that I haven’t studied for, nor have I attended any of the classes, and I’m now suddenly realizing that this isn’t a recurring nightmare it’s just me remembering college.
Things you should know if you know me.
I have notoriously disturbing dreams, clearly driven by my anxiety. Sometimes they’re straight up terrifying horror shows, other times they are just upsetting and leave me feeling uneasy, like last night’s.
Eric: “Did you sleep ok? You were tossing and turning.”
Me: “No. I had a dream where, for whatever reason, I was walking around a mall holding thousands of dollars in a bag. And I stopped in the mall arcade, and put a $1000 bill in the arcade machine, even though I meant to put in a $10. But then it was too late. So it ate the money and gave me tickets. But then, I actually ended up winning all these vouchers– like thousands of dollars in vouchers. All I had to do was go claim it. But then somehow I misplaced the bag with my cash and vouchers, and I ended up losing all the money I started with, plus the money I won. I started panicking, sweating, running around the mall, trying to retrace my steps. Everyone was telling me how irresponsible I am. And the more they said it, the more I panicked, but no matter what I did I couldn’t find my way back to the money, and nobody would help me.”
Eric: “I dreamt that I wore my new Uggs and someone was like– ‘you don’t have to wear socks with those, they’re so soft!'”
Last night I had a nightmare that I was hanging off the edge of a cliff, and the only person who could save me was Donald Trump. He held out his hand and said, “I’ll save you– but if I do, it will guarantee that I become president.” I looked down and realized my only other option was a bloody, gory, untimely death. So obviously, I took Trump’s hand.
And pulled him down with me.