Tag Archives: tests

Multiple Choice Strategy

A kid hands in his state test (multiple choice) with two answers circled for one question. 

Me: “You can only choose one answer for each question.”

Kid: “Well, I know but I couldn’t decide between B and C. So I’m just going to do both.”

Me: “You can’t do both. If you choose both, it’s automatically wrong.”

Kid: “Ok.”

(Does nothing) 

Me: “Please choose one answer.”

Kid: “No thank you. I’ll take my chances.”

I’m not sure you understand how chances work. 

  

Every Child Left Behind (in a pool of tears and anxiety-induced vomit)

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Teachers, people with children, or anyone who knows or cares about teachers or children, this John Oliver rant on standardized testing is a MUST WATCH.

Every bit of it is hilarious because it’s so painfully and pathetically true.

Two of my personal fave highlights:

1. “Pearson are the educational equivalent to Time Warner Cable– either you’ve never had an interaction with them and don’t care, or….they HAVE RUINED YOUR FUCKING LIFE.”

2. Did anyone else know that Pearson uses Craigslist to recruit test-graders? Yes, that’s right– “Pearson chooses test graders the same way that you’d look for a mattress full of bedbugs or a no-strings-attached hand job.” This is like when I found out that Sing at Camp Robindel was judged by the local balloon lady. (sorry to the 99% of readers who have NO idea what I’m referring to, but to the 1% who do, you know the EXACT disappointed feeling I’m talking about).

Things I Learned in Today’s Professional Development

It’s only “teaching to the test” if you call it “teaching to the test.” If you call it “Test Prep Academy,” it’s best practice.

I’m glad my superiors explained this to me slowly and carefully while swinging a pocket watch and chanting the mantra “we do not teach to the test,” because when I first saw the schedule for the next two months I was starting to wonder why I became a teacher.

But “Test Prep Academy” sounds super fun, guys!!! Can we all wear fatigues?!

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