I had 2 drinks before leaving the apartment just to get through the experience of walking 3 blocks through Times Square.
#anxietydisorder #madeit #thisbetterbegood
Tag Archives: mental health
Humanity
I saw true compassion, humanity, and downright awesomeness last night when I confided in someone I don’t know very well that I have Depression, and he responded first by asking me to tell my story, next by listening intently to everything I said, and then by purchasing tickets for himself and his friends to attend the Active Minds Casino Night event I am co-hosting with friends and family for mental health awareness and suicide prevention.
Good people are everywhere. I learn that every time I share my story, but it still never ceases to amaze me.
The conversation is truly changing. This is a battle we can win.
Come be a part of the movement!
Counterpoint
Therapist: “You have to remember that life is a journey.”
Me: “Yeah, well. So was the Titanic.”
I should pay her more. This can’t be fun.
A Mental Health Simile For The 21st Century
Being low level depressed is like being an iPhone in airplane mode– technically functioning, but incapable of communicating/connecting with others or doing anything remotely useful or fun, so WHAT THE FUCK’S THE POINT?!
Luckily it’s only a temporary setting.
You’ll be iMessageing again in no time. 
When PMS and Monday Collide
Goddamnit, crossing guard– what the hell is the point of living in NYC if I can’t jaywalk?!? This is like, the ONE point you had over LA.
And what the fuck is this weather?!?!? Foggy with a chance of murder?
Are you SERIOUS, door? You want me to PULL you open? Who has time for this shit?!
Why is everything working against me today?!?!?!
I was just trying to do you all a favor
But Seriously, I’m Never Dramatic
Well That’s One Perspective
“It sounds like you were just really, really hot.”
— my therapist, when I told the dramatic tale of my “full blown panic attack” in the non-air-conditioned school library.
Alright I’ll admit that’s a possibility.
Perhaps THIS Will Help You Understand
“You know how you felt when you saw a white/gold dress and your friends all saw a blue/black dress and you just sat there thinking ‘holy shit, is everyone insane, or am I insane? This doesn’t make sense. What is happening?!’
That’s how I feel ALL THE FUCKING TIME. About EVERYTHING.”
— Me, when an incredibly stable friend asked what it’s like to have an anxiety disorder.
Social Media and the Suicide of Madison Holleran
Tragic, touching, and so SO important. Madison Holleran’s story reminds me of the importance of keeping it honest on social media. Yes, it’s tempting to post that life is fabulous (and it certainly can be at times) or to filter every photo (not that I’m ever going to stop that entirely), but let’s mix it up with a dose of reality as well.
That’s the true goal of this blog– sure, I like to entertain, but I mostly want to show that life is often hard, wholly imperfect, awkward, uncomfortable, and at times we’re going to feel terrible things and have dark, unsettling thoughts. And that’s ok. We’re all in this together. Humor and written expression is my outlet and defense against the demons, and if one person out there reads about my dips into depression, my irrational anxieties, my occasional struggles to get out of bed, my moments of discomfort in my own skin, and for even one second feels a little less alone or a little brighter about their own struggle, then my work here is done.
I wish Madison had had some more imperfect Instagram feeds to scroll through. Maybe then she would have known she’s not the only one.
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