If you look at the historical site on the computer WHILE in Israel, you totally went to it.
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Word-Predict Fail
That moment when the coworkers of the guy you’re dating send you a super helpful email with suggestions for Israel, so you message him on What’sApp to say that you “love love love them!”, but word-predict decides to do you a solid and you hit send before you realize.
I hate my life.
No One Trusts Me
It’s weird.
Everyone Has That Super Innocent Friend
A group of us are discussing (not doing, just discussing) the drug Molly.
Friend: “What’s Molly? Is it the same as Mary Jane?”
No. No to everything you just said.
“I’m sorry. I forgot to put in your order. What was it again?”
— waitress, 1 hour after we ordered.
#israel
Welcome to Israel!
Family Communication
This about sums it up.
Orthodox Jews Love Me
That moment when you wake from an Ambien-induced airplane slumber to find that the 10-year-old, yarmulke-wearing orthodox boy who was sitting next to you has now traded seats with his grandmother, as your tendency to unconsciously lean over, curl up and drool on his shoulder was making him uncomfortable.
It’s Simple
All my friends: “I want to make the blog! How do I make the blog?”
By not doing that.
I’m Never Making THAT Mistake Again
When I flew to Israel 2 years ago and went through the VERY intense security check, I was irrationally intimidated by the seriousness with which the Israeli man questioned me. So I did what I always do when I’m uncomfortable– I got sarcastic.
Security: “Are you jewish?”
Me: “Yes.”
Security: “Do you have a hebrew name?”
Me: “Yes.”
Security: “What is your hebrew name?”
Me: “Shoshana.”
Security: “Where did you get this name from?”
Me: “I don’t know…God?”
He did not smile. At all. In fact, there was a 10 second period where I was certain he was not going to let me on the plane.
So tonight when I go through the Israeli security, I will not be making that mistake again.
This time, I’ll give a wink after the sarcastic comment. Maybe even a friendly little “jk” punch to his shoulder.
Because I think the problem is that last time, he just missed the joke.
Which is ok.
Not everyone can be as smart as Americans.
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