Kid: “Why are we watching Frozen?”
Me: “Because we are in the midst of a ‘social issues’ unit, and this movie beautifully illustrates the human struggle to fit in.”
Because it’s hot in here.
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Jail
Today the NYC Department of Ed added Pandora and Netflix to their list of banned websites. Already on this list is every single shopping website, including Amazon.com, where all of us teachers have our class supply wish lists.
Co-worker: “All shopping sites of any kind are banned. It’s like jail.”
Kid: “No, you can shop online in jail.”
Right. Of course you can.
Well what do you expect, given our crappy dental insurance?
I’m doing the best I can, kids.
Fair Enough
“I didn’t feel like it.”
— Kid, when asked why he didn’t come to school on time.
Hindsight is 20/20
Being a Special Education teacher is a great profession for me because, given that I have ADD and anxiety, and given how that affected my own school experience, I can totally relate to how these kids are feeling, and can therefore be super patient and supportive.
….is what I thought when I got into this profession.
What actually happened is that I signed up to work in a hot, dirty classroom full of 30 kids who represent everything I hate about myself.
This is less a recipe for patience than it is a recipe for pulling my hair out strand by srand, finding the nearest table, crawling under it, and rocking back and forth in the fetal postion.
Good intentions, though.
I Get It.
Me: “It’s our last tutoring session of the year! Are you excited?”
Kid: “OH MY GOD YESSSSS!!!”
Alright calm the fuck down.
Nope, it’s not the bagel.
My excessive sweating is just a mix of crappy AC and a raging anxiety disorder.
Thanks for reminding me, though.
No, I haven’t influenced these kids at all.
Why do you ask?
From the “Health” Section of Our Class Newspaper
Amen, kid.
As a reminder….
White Flag
And just when you think “Oh, it’s not too hot this morning, maybe the kids will make it to the 5th floor and not be completely drenched in sweat!”, you remember they have gym 1st period today.
White flag. Surrender.
Our classroom will never not smell.
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