Literally the slowest-moving person we know, god love her.


Literally the slowest-moving person we know, god love her.


In terms of wedding dress shopping (or life in general), there is pretty much nothing more annoying than when your mother disapproves of the choice you’ve made, and insists you explore other options because you just “never know.” Excuse me, but I am an adult, and I do know. I am perfectly capable of making this decision on my own. But fine, you came in to NYC, so I will humor you and go to ONE MORE PLACE and try on that dress that I would NEVER have thought to pick for myself, just so you can have the satisfaction of knowing I DID give your ridiculous opinions a shred of consideration.
Which leads us to the ONE thing in the world which is even MORE annoying than when your mother doesn’t trust your judgement–
When your mother is right.*
Bought the dress right on the spot.
About 398459238490 times better than the one I picked.
Thanks, Mom.

*I reserve the right to deny this post during future arguments.
Sent my sister a photo of myself in what I am 99.9% sure is my wedding dress….

No response.
“31 years.”
— my brother Jeremy, 31, on how long he’s been working on the speech/roast he will give at my rehearsal dinner.

Eric is meeting my 1st cousins for the first time this weekend at a family wedding. We are prepping.
Me: “Ok, so again. The siblings of the groom are…”
Eric: “Helen!….and Mirren!”
Me: “No.”
Eric: “Mork and Mindy!”
Jacob and Miriam.

We’re going to an out of town family wedding together this weekend and there’s been essentially zero coordination.




