A student misbehaved yesterday so I sent a note home explaining the incident to her mom, and asked that the note be signed and returned. Today the kid handed me this.
Me: “So your mom read and signed THIS paper?”
Kid: “Yes.”
Category Archives: Kids/Teaching
Well Then Let’s Just Say You’re My New Best Friend
In a lesson about text interpretation, our class analyzed the Cyndi Lauper song “True Colors” (because it fit the lesson, and also because if these kids don’t know who Cyndi Lauper is, I’ll cry). After playing the song a few times and discussing it, we asked the students to write a response explaining the song’s meaning.
Twenty minutes later, a kid (9 years old) approached me with his finished essay. The opening line read:
“The lyrics say ‘Let your colors show,’ and that means that you have to express your feelings and let the beast inside of you awaken so that you can become who you truly are destined to be.”
I read this aloud and laughed, impressed but also wondering where the hell he came up with that phrasing.
The kid leaned in close, utterly satisfied with himself, and with a straight face said– “Let’s just say I watch a LOT of Oprah.”
I stopped reading and gave him an A+.
Ebola Mom, Part 10
(Part of the Ebola Mom series)
Because I gave them to a homeless man.
Things People Say to Me at Work
Co-worker: “In the computer lab, one of your students downloaded pictures of cakes shaped like butts, with brown icing coming out of them to look like poop. Just so you know.”
Yeah That’s Not How That Works
Kid: “You’re 32?!”
Me: “Yes.”
Kid: “You’re not even younger than my mom.”
Me: “Great. And thanks.”
Kid: “Well don’t feel bad– you ARE shorter than her, at least.”
Things I Learned in Today’s Professional Development
It’s only “teaching to the test” if you call it “teaching to the test.” If you call it “Test Prep Academy,” it’s best practice.
I’m glad my superiors explained this to me slowly and carefully while swinging a pocket watch and chanting the mantra “we do not teach to the test,” because when I first saw the schedule for the next two months I was starting to wonder why I became a teacher.
But “Test Prep Academy” sounds super fun, guys!!! Can we all wear fatigues?!
Ebola Mom, Part 9
(Part of the Ebola Mom series)
Your nanny’s a liar. And you can shove your cookies up your gloves.
Things That Make Me Terrified To Have Children
Spotted in the apartment of my sister, who is a new mom:
My favorite part is when she gets the math wrong and has to recalculate. To be fair to Steph, though….
Sorry, Kid
Kid: “My mom is a psychologist.”
Me: “I know! That’s a really important job.”
Kid: “Yeah. But it’s annoying sometimes.”
Me: “Why is that?”
Kid: “Because, like, her patients always need her. Like last night we were playing together and then one of her patients called and she had to listen to her for like TWO HOURS while she went on and on and on about her feelings. And I’m just like ‘who is this person who has to talk about her feelings THIS much?!'”
It was probably me.
The Good Old Days
During my walk to work this morning, I watched two brothers trotting along to school. One was young, pre-k aged, and the other looked about 4th grade age (the grade I now teach). The older brother was juggling a chapter book while jotting in a journal, in what I assume was a last-minute attempt to finish his homework. He looked stressed. The younger kid, meanwhile, spotted a bug on the sidewalk and went APESHIT with excitement. And I couldn’t help but think, as I watched this, how much I miss teaching Kindergarten– that carefree, blissful age when simply finding a bug on the ground can elicit that much enthusiasm, wonderment and joy.
Then he ate the bug.
#fourthgradeforever
Emily's Posts 