If you run a full marathon (and I did– I have finish-line witnesses), but your time chip stops working after the 13.1 mile mark, did you really run a full marathon?
The answer is yes. You ran a full marathon in 2:09.
#besttimeever
Tag Archives: training
Harder
When I pulled up a map and showed Eric the various locations he can cheer for me during the Philly marathon on Sunday, he jokingly sighed and said, “You know, this day is turning out to be much harder for me than it will be for you.”
Then he got up off the couch and went out to pick up some ice.
To put on his face.
Because I kicked him in it.
Really? ANYONE?
Me: “I’m running a marathon in Philadelphia this weekend!”
Kid: “Wow, really? I saw some of the New York marathon from my window, it was awesome!”
Me: “Yeah, it’s pretty amazing, huh? 26.2 miles!”
Kid: “Yeah. That’s what I thought! But my mom says that as long as you do the training right, really anyone can run a marathon.”
Me: “Your mom is a smart lady!”
She can go fuck herself, though.
The Breakdown
90% of running a marathon is about complaining.
18% is about bacon.
13% is about bragging rights.
I guess 0% is about accurate math. Because who has time for math when ALL YOU DO IS RUN?!?!!??
See. There it is. 90%.
Bragging
A friend of mine just started training/fundraising for her first race. She knows that I’ve had some experience in this realm, so she asked for some fundraising tips, and I told her that she needs to abuse social media and post about all her accomplishments/hard work while she fundraises. Her response….
Ummm yeah. I just ran longer than any human should ever run, and I’m PROUD of that (even if my knees, stomach, and hips hate me). Because that is AWESOME. There are not many areas of my life that I feel are brag-worthy, so I’m picking this one. And raising some money for some good causes while I’m at it. And that’s ok!
Now go, find that thing you’re proud of and brag away. Maybe also consider giving back as you brag. It’s ok to be proud of yourselves, people!
Just, you know. Don’t go overboard.
No one is proud of you for having a cat.
Marathon Day Will be a Major Milestone in Our Relationship
Ever since Eric and I started dating, I have been in some stage of marathon training. I’ve been waking up early to do very long runs, and he’s patiently been dealing with my constant exhaustion (and subsequent irritability), 8:15pm betimes, complaints of stomach cramps and soreness, self-imposed anxiety, profuse sweating, raging and erratic hunger, frequent napping, bizarre skin chaffing, and complete lack of motivation to leave the neighborhood because I JUST. CAN’T.
So needless to say, he is super psyched for the day this marathon is over.
What he doesn’t realize, however, is that it is going to be a pretty rough day.
Because that’s the day he will discover that none of the above has anything to do with marathon training.
It’s just who I am as a person.
#toolatenow #strategy
You Can Learn a Very Good Lesson From My Family
This morning, as I was running at 6am after having been sick all week, I started to doubt my ability to run this upcoming Philadelphia marathon.
But then I remembered that I ran my very first marathon a few years ago with an extremely painful UTI (don’t ask. I discovered it too late. And I’d come too far).
And my sister ran a half marathon with a bladder full of kidney stones.
And my brother ran a half marathon with two extremely chafed, stinging, bleeding nippples.
And we ALL finished our races. And made pretty good time! Which just goes to show.
My family is disgusting.
We really should take better care of ourselves.
Jesus Christ.
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