He has not responded.
Tag Archives: dating
I Once Dated a Guy Who Called His Mom “Mommy”
End of story. Well, not END of story, but not the beginning of a story that is going anywhere good.
Sorry, guys. I’ve been sick and fairly isolated for over a week now and this is the shit that goes through my head when I try to force myself to rest.
Which is why I try not to rest too much.
Which might be why I’m always sick.
Whatever, at least I’m not whining about it to my MOMMY.
Anyway, the point of all this is…
Do you think that guy’s still single?
Any guy who loves his mom that much would definitely make me some chicken noodle soup.
Ok, sorry, that was absurd.
Matzoh ball soup.
Always Be Honest With Your Dating App, Part 9
(Part of the Always Be Honest With Your Dating App series)
Dating: Two Perspectives
Me (looking at my latest dating match): “Aw, he’s a veterinarian! If he’s a vet, he must be a good person.”
Friend: “Or he’s a person who likes to stick his finger up buttholes.”
Right. Or that.
This Guy Who Broke The Camel’s Back
This Compassionate Guy
I’m fine. Thanks for asking.
Apparently I Owe All Men An Apology
Because, as my male friend just informed me, my post Well, Yeah, Kid- Every Girl Loves a Blowjob was extremely misleading and disappointing.
So I’m sorry to all the men who read the title of that post and felt hopeful, for a brief second, that the world was exactly the opposite of everything they’ve known and experienced their entire lives.
It’s not.
There’s a reason your wife stopped doing that once you married her.
Always Be Honest With Your Dating App, Part 8
My Married Mom Friends Are Adorable But Useless
Last night at dinner with one of my dearest friends (who is a married, mom-of-two-kids) I asked for her opinion on the below text, as I feel like I’ve completely lost perspective and can no longer tell when a guy is being genuine or a douche.
Her takeaway: “Who is Drake? And what’s yolo?”
He TOTALLY Gets Me
That moment on a first date when you think you’re totally connecting with him…
Him: “I can’t get any work or writing done in my apartment.”
Me: “Same here! Totally. I can’t concentrate at all in my apartment.”
Him: “Exactly. It’s impossible.”
Me (certain we are on the exact same wavelength): “Right? Because I’ll just look up and see something and be like ‘Oh, I need to clean that.’ Or ‘Yikes, I should mail that bill’ Or ‘Why do I have nothing in my fridge?'”
Him: “Oh. I don’t do THAT. I just get distracted by more fun or interesting things to do.”
Me: “Oh.”
Him: “That’s some serious masochistic behavior.”
Me: “Is it?”
Him: “Yeah. You’re really beating yourself up.”
Me: “Alright, it’s not that bad.”
Him: “It sounds like you have an anxiety disorder.”
He hasn’t called.
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