All posts by Emily

An Early Mother’s Day Tribute to My Fabulous Mom

Family, Kids/Teaching, , , , , , , ,

There are a few kids in my class having a really hard time understanding fractions as parts of a whole. I remember fractions being such a simple concept for me to understand as a kid, so I’ve been wracking my brain, trying to figure out how I learned them so easily.

Then I remembered. It was from my mother threatening my siblings and me:

“You better do as I say by the time I count to 3, or SO HELP ME GOD. One! (blank stares), Two!…(no movement)….Two and a HALF (nothing)…Two and THREE QUARTERS (shit, that’s close to three wholes…should we do something? WHAT COMES AFTER THREE?!)”.

We never found out.

But I’m good at math now.

So thanks, Mom.

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Social Media and the Suicide of Madison Holleran

Mental Health, , , , , , , , , , , ,

http://espn.go.com/espn/feature/story/_/id/12833146/instagram-account-university-pennsylvania-runner-showed-only-part-story

Tragic, touching, and so SO important. Madison Holleran’s story reminds me of the importance of keeping it honest on social media. Yes, it’s tempting to post that life is fabulous (and it certainly can be at times) or to filter every photo (not that I’m ever going to stop that entirely), but let’s mix it up with a dose of reality as well.

That’s the true goal of this blog– sure, I like to entertain, but I mostly want to show that life is often hard, wholly imperfect, awkward, uncomfortable, and at times we’re going to feel terrible things and have dark, unsettling thoughts. And that’s ok. We’re all in this together. Humor and written expression is my outlet and defense against the demons, and if one person out there reads about my dips into depression, my irrational anxieties, my occasional struggles to get out of bed, my moments of discomfort in my own skin, and for even one second feels a little less alone or a little brighter about their own struggle, then my work here is done.

I wish Madison had had some more imperfect Instagram feeds to scroll through. Maybe then she would have known she’s not the only one.

Not Every Idea Is a Good Idea

Kids/Teaching, , , , , ,

Kid: “I have a really good idea for when I’m older. It’s going to change the world.”

Me: “Great. I hope you acknowledge me, your supportive and inspiring 4th grade teacher, when you do it!”

Kid: “I definitely will.”

Me: “So am I allowed to know the idea? Just so I can prepare for fame.”

Kid: “Yeah. So you know how subway cars are always killing rats that live in the subway?”

Me (already regretting any involvement in this): “Yeah…”

Kid: “Well, I’m going to start a program that will protect the subway rats.”

Me: “May I ask why you feel the subway rats need protection?”

Kid: “Like, why should they have to die? They’re innocent! They can be protected and domesticated. Kept as pets, even! Everyone in NYC could have a pet rat! We could save them ALL!”

I take it back. Don’t you dare mention me.

In fact, we never met.

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Stigma Fighters Come in All Sizes

Kids/Teaching, Mental Health, , , , , ,

I was just walking the halls at school and came across this student-written poster outside a 5th grade classroom. They are in the midst of a “Social Issues” unit, and these are some of the topics that 10 year olds came up with during a brainstorming of ideas– issues that kids in 5TH GRADE think we need to be talking about and tackling. 

I am blown away and touched to see that Suicide and Depression made this list. This is such a clear and positive sign that the conversation about mental health is changing for this next generation. 

Kudos to the 5th grade teachers for displaying this and creating an environment for open and honest conversation about ALL issues, no matter the stigma attached. 

  

Dating App PSA

Dating/Single Life, , , , , , , , ,

Dear All Men Everywhere,

It is really REALLY super creepy when the main profile photo on your dating app is a picture of yourself as a young boy. Do you think we like this? I’m so confused. This is the only photo we see in that first instant when we decide if we’re swiping right or left– are you TRYING to attract a woman who looks at a picture of a 5 year old boy and says “Ooooh, tell me MORE!”?

If that IS who you’re looking for, maybe try looking somewhere else.

Like jail.

That’s where pedophiles are. In jail.

Now stop being a creepster. The world has enough problems.

Emily

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I Officially Have No Idea What They’re Talking About

Kids/Teaching, ,

Kid: “I don’t even know why we have the Common Core Curriculum. It’s ridiculous. Kids don’t like it, parents don’t like it, teachers DEFINITELY don’t like it…” (Pauses for my reaction) 

Me: “I have no comment on this. I’m going to stay out of trouble on this one.”

Kid: “Yup. This is exactly like with horseback riding.  If the rider acts afraid, the horse will sense it. It’s the same with bees. They’re very sensitive.”

Me: “Exactly.”