Tag Archives: career

Dammit.

Kids, Kids/Teaching, , ,

Chatting with parent before tutoring session…

Parent (referring to my switch from classroom teaching to full-time tutoring): “So you must love that you get to be your own boss now, right?”
Me: “Oh, absolutely. That’s one of the best things about my new career!”

(Later, alone with the kid)

Me: “You look a little distracted. Everything ok?”
Kid: “Yeah, I was just thinking– you said to Mom that you love being your own boss, but my mom pays you, so isn’t SHE your boss?”
Me: “Well, sort of, but technically…”
Kid: “And also, she could fire you, like how a boss does.”
Me: “Well yeah but…”
Kid: “And really, you work with a lot of kids, so each kid’s parent is your boss. So instead of having one boss you now have like a MILLION bosses.”
Me: “Ok, let’s get back to the math problem.”
Kid: “Why? Because I’m right?”
Me: “Yes.”

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Things I Can Do Now

Kids/Teaching, Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , ,

Sometimes I get anxious about my new career path– because change, no matter how good and how healthy, is always difficult for me (and, like, everyone on Earth. I know I’m not unique in this. I do think I am slightly more panicked/anxious/dramatic/unable-to-calm-the-fuck-down-y than the average human during a transition, but I recognize that general feelings of discomfort are pretty universal. So if anyone else is out there going through a time of change, feel free to hit me up for some commiseration. Or just try the exercise below. I found it extremely therapeutic, and I think it would make both my therapist and Oprah proud.)

Here’s a nifty list of things I can do now that I am no longer a classroom teacher, just as a reminder that I made the right choice for myself.

  1. Pee
  2. Pee in a bathroom that is a bathroom, not a closet or former jail cell
  3. Breathe without inhaling germs
  4. Breathe (in general)
  5. Go to the doctor
  6. Not go to the doctor, because I’m not sick anymore
  7. Have air conditioning when it’s hot
  8. Have heat when it’s cold
  9. Overall do my work in temperatures humans were meant to exist in
  10. Read the news
  11. Curse
  12. Curse while reading the news
  13. Not eat a packed lunch
  14. Not make a packed lunch
  15. Not make 5 packed lunches at once on Sunday night because the process of packing a lunch is so depressing, I have to do it all in one shot
  16. Cry. In the moment I feel like crying, without having to find the nearest janitors closet.
  17. Raise my voice without fear of abuse charges
  18. Make an important phone call without fear of being caught
  19. Answer an important phone call without fear of being caught
  20. Read/write an important text/email without fear of being caught
  21. Eat a snack without fear of being caught
  22. Drink a hot beverage without fear of being caught
  23. Not fear being caught for doing things all humans need to do to be human
  24. Wake up no earlier than 7:00am, as God intended
  25. Teach the way I want to teach, teach everything I planned to teach, and use my actual personality while teaching, because behavior management is no longer the priority
  26. Be honest, not politically correct, with parents.
  27. Truly know and care about every single child I work with (some classroom teachers are able to do this– I found it impossible)
  28. Be appropriately compensated for the work I do and the effort I put forth
  29. Feel effective
  30. Feel appreciated
  31. Pee (it’s worth repeating)

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Within Reason

Kids, Kids/Teaching, , , ,

Tutoring a 9 year old boy….

Kid: “My dad says when I grow up I have to be a doctor or a lawyer or someone who makes lots of money. But my teacher says I can be whatever I want to be! Right?”

Me (frustrated by this kind of parenting): “Of course you can be whatever you want to be! You have to figure out what makes YOU happy. Nobody can tell you what you can and can’t do with your life!”

Kid: “Ok good. Because I want to be a dog walker.”

Oh ok no. You can’t do that.

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A Few Clarifiers About My Retirement

Kids/Teaching, Teaching, , , , , , , , , , ,

I am in day 2 of my retirement and I feel the need to address some questions/comments/concerns that have come my way regarding my decision to leave classroom teaching. This is not a rant– you’ve all been awesomely enthusiastic about it. Just want to clear up some confusion.

1. To be clear, I only left classroom teaching. I am not retired and lying around doing nothing. I’m not sure why this is so confusing for people. Maybe it’s because I keep calling it “my retirement.” img_7921-2

2. I did not quit my job because I met a man to take care of me, and now I don’t have to work. That is absurd. This is real life, not Real Housewives of Potomac.  img_7921-2  I am still working. But yes, Eric did give me the support, encouragement, stability and gentle kick in the ass I needed to finally leave something that was making me unhappy (and had been for years) and move on to pursue things that bring me joy and contentment. And for that I am eternally grateful.

3. “But I thought you love the people you work with?” I do. With all my heart. They are now some of my best friends on earth, and will remain so. The people I met in my 7 years at that school are the only reason I stayed as long as I did, and I never could have made it through without them. They are my family. My actual job, and all the political/administrative limitations placed on it, is what left me unfulfilled. Not the people. My co workers are, and always will be, the brightest spot in my memory of classroom teaching.

4. “So what are those things you’re going to pursue?” As of now– full time tutoring (which focuses on all the aspects I love about teaching without the systemic BS that prevents me from actually helping children), getting more involved in mental health causes, working on my blog, pursuing freelance writing opportunities, and, honestly, whatever else I think of that sounds exciting!

5. Which leads to the final question/concern: “But if you don’t have crazy stories about classroom teaching, or crazy stories about dating, what are you going to write about?”

Yeah, well, I don’t know, people. I’m just hoping it turns out better for me than it did for this guy.

The_shining_heres_johnny

 

Sometimes I Wish She Listened Less

Kids/Teaching, Mental Health, , , , , , , , , , ,

Therapist: “So do you feel relieved now that you finally gave your boss notice that you’re quitting your job?”

Me: “Oh my god, YES. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m anxious about the upcoming change. And it’s bittersweet. And I’m really going to miss being with my coworkers every day, several of whom are my closest friends. But I’m also excited, and know it’s the right thing. But more than anything I’m just really proud of myself. Usually, if I’m in a situation that’s comfortable, it takes me forever to get out of it, even when I know it’s what I need to do. But this time, I knew in like December that I needed out, and by February, I made the decision and did it.”

Therapist: “Right! (pause) Well..2010.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Therapist: “You knew in December, 2010.”

Me: “Well, I mean, I didn’t really know then.”

Therapist (flipping through her notes): “December 6, 2010– ‘I need to quit my job. I’m unhappy in the system. I don’t feel fulfilled. I feel like if I stay one more year, I’m going to go insane.”

Me: “Right but that was just venting– I didn’t like KNOW know.”

Therapist (still quoting): “‘I know this with every fiber of my being.'”

Me: “Oh.”

Alright well I did it so BACK THE FUCK OFF.

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The Results of State Testing

Random Thoughts/Happenings, Uncategorized, , , , , , ,

Tomorrow begins state testing. My 9-year-old students will come to school and sit for hours to take a test that is not remotely reflective of what they know, who they are, or what they are capable of achieving.

So in honor of these torturous, painful, anxiety-inducing tests that my young students have to suffer through and I have to watch them suffer through, I quit my job.

Hah, just kidding!

That’s not why I quit.

It makes me feel pretty good about my decision, though.

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Ok yeah it’s a little bit why I quit.

 

 

 

The Plan

Kids, Kids/Teaching, Mental Health, , , , , , , , , , ,

Therapist: “You’ve been saying for a while now that you might want a career change. It seems you haven’t felt very fulfilled at your current job.”

Me: “Right.”

Therapist: “And you said you were going to take some time, explore some options, talk to a few people, do some research, and come up with a plan.”

Me: “Right.”

Therapist: “So, you did that?”

Me: “Yes I did!”

Therapist: “And you have a plan?”

Me: “Yes, in fact I do!

Therapist: “I mean besides ‘get pregnant and quit.'”

Me: “Oh. Then no.”

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