Me scrambling to fill the hole in my life now that Game of Thrones is over.
Tag Archives: tv
Donna Chang
Me: “With everything going on in our country right now, I’m honestly just so horrified and saddened as a human in general– but as a Jew in particular, as I know you can relate–”
Therapist: “Oh I’m actually not Jewish.”
Me: “You’re NOT?! But your last name–”
Therapist: “I know. A common Jewish last name. People often assume I am Jewish.”
Me: “But I feel like I’ve had all these insider only-jews-would-get-this kind of exchanges with you.”
Therapist: “Hmm. I didn’t interpret them that way.”
Me: (silence)
Therapist: “What are you thinking?”
Me: “Oh, oh nothing. This obviously doesn’t change anything.”
I just have to re-think every piece of advice you’ve ever given me.
When She Says It It Sounds So Rational
“Let’s focus more on what makes sense for you, in your life, right now, and less on what makes sense for Kim Kardashian. In fact, as a broader goal, maybe we don’t make the Kardashians a factor in any decisions, big or small, ever.”
— Therapist, after I explained the reason for my current “Should I be freezing my eggs?!” anxiety-spiral.
I Blame Trump
Turns out I cannot deposit this check written out to “Mr. and Mrs. Taylor” while I am still technically Emily Lerman.
This is how it begins.
Romance
After we come in from the cold, Eric sets up the second TV for football viewing while I cuddle under a blanket on the couch, nestling in for an afternoon together.
Eric (looking at me with adoration): “I mean…does it get any better than this?! I got the love of my life right here…”
Me: “Awww.”
Eric: “And I’ve got you.”
“Oh!! It’s like a trans…PARENT.”
— Eric, 3 seasons into Transparent.
Is anybody else REALLY FUCKING EXCITED for “This is Us”??!!??!?!
Watch this trailer and don’t cry I double dog DARE you (whether or not I’m drunk right now is irrelevant).
Toss-up
Which is more wildly unacceptable– the fact that someone allowed “American Dad” to be a part of the TBS syndicated line-up, or the fact that I have nothing better to do at 1:00pm on a Thursday than to both watch it and complain about it?
Either way, not great.
#summerofgeorge
Let me put this in terms you can understand
Watching “The Bachelorette”…
Eric: “Wait, so…at the end of this, the bachelorette proposes to the guy?”
Me: “No. The guy proposes.”
Eric: “So she chooses the guy who then has to propose to her?”
Me: “Yeah.”
Eric: <confused>
Me: “Like what I’m doing.”
(pause)
Eric: “Ok yeah I get it now.”
How To Feel Young
Get some slightly older siblings who don’t understand technology.
Andrew (only 5 months older than me, aka MY AGE, by the way) repeatedly insists, “I don’t do apps. Everything an app does I can do on the internet.”
No.
He also claims “I don’t know how to use a flash drive because they didn’t exist when I was in college,” but that’s just him lying, which is a topic for another post.
Unfortunately, this attitude has married my sister, who at least understands that she doesn’t understand anything, but isn’t exactly determined to learn.
The result is this.
I promise you they will not.
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